Tuesday, May 27, 2008

My A&P Champion

So I thought I’d take the time to look back at The Champ.

The Champ was my nickname for my Anatomy and Physiology professor last semester. He was one of the more amazing teachers I have ever had. Mostly because he would go off on tangents about random things and we would learn all about how something he did “Back in ‘Nam” relates perfectly with the numbering of the Cranial Nerves.

But at least it helped us remember to some degree.

So I had, throughout the semester, written down quotes from The Champ that were memorable in some way or another. The reasoning behind this, initially, was so that I could show them to one person or the other sometime later for a couple laughs.
But as I gathered quote after quote, I realized that I had a pretty good number of them, and that I could compile a list of them all.

So here is the finished product. The original quotes, and what they meant or referred to, so that you all can enjoy a little humor courtesy The Champ.

1. Bottom Line- Whenever The Champ asks you what this is, you must respond with “Money!”.

2. Criminently!- An expression of frustration used when The Champ finds yet another mistake in the textbook.

3. Hogwash- The word you hear when The Champ has just read something out of the book that is ridiculous to him. Ex: They’re not Electrical Impulses, they’re Action Potentials!

4. Malarkey- This word is used when there is some fantastic claim in the news or popular media that The Champ knows to be false, and wants us all to know it.

5. Folks- This is used when he addresses the class as a whole.

6. Kiddies- This is the word he uses to address that one group of kids in the back who are making noise when he is trying to start the class.

7. Ylo- Apparently, this is how The Champ spells yellow.

8. “I have no morals after final exams”- The Champ on how he doesn’t take any phone calls after the finals are done.

9. “Just like poker, ya plays yer money and ya takes yer chances”- Apparently, this is how The Champ explains the risks and benefits of being out in the sun.

10. “When I got to Vietnam, I was blowing up everything I could get my hands on”- The Champ on Explosives. This is story was somehow connected to the Organ of Corti.

11. “We all start out as little girls. Go home and tell that to Fang, it’ll get him right in the Macho!”- This is The Champ’s explanation of genetics and chromosomes.

12. “If you have motion sickness, even one fluid movin’ is enough to make you blow your tubes. Lookin’ for Ralph. Huey.” – The Champ’s vast vomiting vocabulary. This was in relation to the semicircular canals and how they affect your equilibrium.

13. “That’s real whiz-bang stuff right there” This is The Champ’s way of explaining that something is complicated.

14. “Don’t look at the clock now! I wanna spend another 10 minutes telling interesting Navy Stories!” – About everybody checking the time near the end of class.

15. “Who? Your feet don’t fit no limb”- Used when someone was stuttering in the process of asking about someone else.

16. Turnin’ and Burnin’- This is apparently what happens when a muscle is at peak levels of activity.

17. That's as cool as all get out- This was an exclaimation used to express The Champ’s feelings of amazement.

18. “If some guy in a pickup truck pulls out in front of you on the highway, what happens to your heart rate/blood pressure?”- A question that is frequently heard when talking about the cardiovascular system. The answers (for those with no common sense) are that your heart rate goes up and your blood pressure increases.

19. Packaging Peanuts- How The Champ describes loose areolar connective tissue.

20. “Why do we have butts? I’ll tell ya why. No, they’re not for sittin’, they’re for walkin’!”- During our lab discussion about the pelvic girdle.

21. Yer Sideburns- The masseter muscles.

22. Yer Smilers- The risorius muscles.

23. Yer Spitter- The buccinator muscles.

24. Yer Frowner- The depressor angulis oris.

25. Thingamabig- Word used to describe something large when The Champ can’t think of the word.

26. “When you’re out at night sneaking around at night being sneaky”- The Champ on when the rod-shaped photoreceptors in the eye come in handy.

27. “See?? It looks like a bird!!”- Apparently, this is how The Champ sees the saggital cross section of the Diencephalon. The hypothalamus is the beak, the intermediate mass is the eye, and the choroid plexus is the eyebrow.

This is also an attempt to get this pre-med blog back on it's pre-med topic. I've been slacking lately. So here's to The Champ. And to my pre-med Anatomy and Physiology class. It was a good one.


Scott & Jenna said...

I have no wise pre-med comments to make - just laughing at your professor's funny comments & your fabulous notes.

Bongi said...

funny. i enjoyed this. pity it's the complete works. more would be good.

Cherie said...

What a great class!! Did you know I wanted to be a doctor? My favorite class involved cadavers. Learned much that year as we dissected a human body. The body is a miracle--no other way to explain it. So, obviously I'm not a doctor---chose motherhood instead. No regrets. Still have some doctor moments, especially with 5 boys.

Bongi said...

p.s i enjoyed your voice on the doc a show.

Dreaming again said...


James said...

Hey, you shouldn't be taking physiology now - you'll get plenty of that in med school. Have some fun, for pete's sake!

meredith hunt said...

thats so funny!